Sign up for a free recipe e-book →

The Side Effects of Endorphins

, , ,

Ask The Expert

Published by

K Mark Schofer

on

Ask The Expert

Write your guide to setting healthy boundaries in relationships.

Because that would be someone other than myself. I am not being hyperbolic when saying this is not my area of expertise.

Or maybe conflict comes naturally and how you handle that conflict that is a barometer of success or what you want out of a relationship.

Here is a not so typical example hoping to bolster my case that I am no expert.

Her – “ could you please take my clothes off?”

Me – “ but I like this sweatshirt it’s nice and warm”

Her – “ wear the sweatshirt that has all the paint all over it it’s nice and warm“

Me – “that sounds reasonable”

Me – “ I just got back from the store and I got the cats vaccinations taken care of.”

Her – “ you wore that sweatshirt to the store“

So here are some axioms for the democracy known as marriage. Keep in mind there are many different types of relationships in your life.

Right now I’m talking about the democracy known as marriage and the filibuster.

  1. Avoid filibusters.
  2. Ask for what you want
  3. Avoid hyperbole
  4. You’re both unique individuals, respect that.
  5. Set time for yourself. You deserve that and your partner deserves that.

I remember one time many many years ago. We had this very cool tandem bike. I’m carefree and easy and my partner she is uptight in certain situations.

We did not do well at navigating a tandem.

I have my own bike and it’s in the garage and I ride it often. She has a bike in the garage. It has a flat tire and hangs out from the ceiling.

Well yesterday, her E bike arrived. It is a pretty cool ride.

  • 6. Be flexible and creative.
  • 7. Bedtime – I like to stay up later and have time to myself to read, write paint and just be me.

Case Study Two

Lyrics -Fireworks

We hung out together every single moment
‘Cause that’s what we thought married people do
Complete with the grip of artificial chaos

There is no normal role of what Married people do. Each relationship is different. Fireworks is a perfect misplaced metaphor.

Apparently, there’s a song by Katy Perry and this I quoted above is from The Tragically Hip.

There is a moral to this story.

Justin Trudeau’s favorite group is The Hip but apparently he skipped the Canadian World Cup game to see Katy play in concert

You don’t have to feel like a waste of space
You’re original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds.

KP

One response to “Ask The Expert”

  1. vermavkv Avatar
    vermavkv

    What a refreshingly honest and relatable reflection. I especially enjoyed the humor woven throughout—from the sweatshirt misunderstanding to the tandem bike analogy—which perfectly illustrates that successful relationships are less about expertise and more about adaptability, communication, and grace. Your observations remind us that there is no universal blueprint for marriage; every partnership creates its own rhythm through compromise, respect, and a willingness to laugh at life’s small absurdities. Perhaps the greatest wisdom here is acknowledging that conflict itself isn’t the enemy—how we navigate it, while preserving each other’s individuality, is what truly strengthens the bond. Insightful, authentic, and wonderfully human.

I would love to hear you opinion as well

Hello,

I’m Mark

His friends observe Mark seems wired a little differently. Perhaps it’s more likely that noticing little things often missed by others is a relic of a quieter, simpler time. He has a way with words, which he refuses to let be hindered by sub-par typing skills. People have great stories to tell if you sit and listen.

A belief dear to Mark is that there is certain beauty in the world. You simply have to look for it.

Let’s connect

Join the fun!

Stay updated with our latest tutorials and ideas by joining our newsletter.

Recent posts