Has your idea of what makes a good friend changed as you’ve gotten older?
I have to dig back to a school at Glenside elementary, fifth grade with Mrs. Caffereli at the helm. For you, enthusiastic fans of my writing, you may say I talk about Mrs. Caffereli way too much. This would be a fair assessment. I did not like her as a teacher. My uncle thought she was hot. I must have been at an impressionable age as I remember some of her prophecy.
She told us in order to be a friend to somebody you must want to be that persons friend. Yes, the common denominator is your willingness to be a friend.
And by all means that has changed drastically over the years. I could say my made up axiom about life still holds water. Many things in this life I view it as one big double elimination tournament. We do have our drinking buddies, our soccer buddies, our college friends and friends of our kids. That’s all it takes and that one connection and that starts the double elimination tournament.
Naturally, I’m being cynical here. I watch these birds sit on a wire on my daily run and I wonder how they found each other. And why they hang out together. It could be something as simple as they like the same Alfred Hitchcock films.
I’m at the point in my life where people I keep in touch with our people I admire how they live their life. Integrity is important to me. We live in a divided society. I think it’s important for a person. Do you have empathy and have deep concern for all society?
And back to the question in hand yes that’s changed over the years because it used to be the criteria of commonality and to share experiences. In other words, have fun together.
And these days, friends are somebody you can grow with and learn something from.
And another factor in this large multi linear equation is how much we value being alone. I hope it’s obvious being alone is different than being lonely.. if we are comfortable with ourselves alone time can be important and refreshing.
The friends we have in life at this time are not here by happenstance. And this certainly does not preclude making new friends. But when you have a good friend, it is worth nourishing that relationship..
I would love to hear you opinion as well