The Side Effects of Endorphins

If you could erase one trend from history, what would it be?

Propaganda

That’s not a typo. Have you played Monopoly. If anybody asks me to play I decline. It is a predictable game, that lasts longer than anticipated. The late stages of the game are inevitable as one person gathers wealth there is very little possibility of turning the game around. who knows where it started.

Rugged Individualism

This concept is sold as an axiom and excuse for capitalism. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps. America is the land of opportunity where everybody can get ahead is a time honored misconception. And now these days Europeans now have started incorporating US business metrics in more consumer centric systems in Europe most notably the health care system. Here is a story called Fake Plastc Love where I take rather gentle jabs at both.

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Heidi often wondered what it would feel like to experience love when you are not actually in love. This was a question posed to the research team at the University of Mainz. Part of the job at a university is going to seminars after hours and on weekends with the goal of a unique perspective on research. Being in research, she is not in the publish or perish cycle. Her drive is to discover something of relative value to her fellow humanity.

She sat on the bench that sat across from the train station. She watched people leave from the train elated coming from a Mainz FC soccer match. Some were carrying beers and others smoked their cigarettes. They looked jovial and in love with their team.

She is nervous and has trouble sleeping at night. Heidi is on the verge of something. She has a fake plastic tree in the corner of her office. She goes to work by bicycle on an E-bike. She does not even celebrate Christmas. She understands the paradox here as she rides her new bike taking her daughter to childcare. Raising a child on her own is not simple and she never thought that it would. Either is finding the biggest placebo pill on the market. All cynasism aside, they think that they are on to something big. The scientists in Ingelheim have whipped up something gigantic. They think they have the formula for what constitutes love within the human brain.

They know how it works and this has always been her project to bring it to market.

She ponders this as she waters her plastic tree with a green watering can.

 Falling in love triggers a powerful brain chemistry cocktail, flooding your system with dopamine (euphoria, reward), norepinephrine (racing heart, alertness), and serotonin (initially low, causing obsession), creating intense pleasure, motivation, and focus on your beloved, like addiction. The scientists recently developed a pill that emulates this. It is a powerful plastic pill, and they are not clear of the power it holds.

The scientists on the team came from varied backgrounds. Some are artist and dreamer’s, python programmers, civil engineers, and one handyperson who works on houses. The development process went against IT standards and was the labyrinth where nobody was quite sure who was working on what. There were placebos needed as some of the workers were simply placebos who thought they were working on this project. Usually in settings like this, most of the communication is in English, for this project, the language was to be German. It was obsfication at its finest. So, they thought, they had the perfect product, a marginally clever idea how to get it to market, but no idea what will happen once it hit the market. There was no market research or focus groups on this project. That is because it was top secret. They believed the product would do well in the United States, where falling in love seems so make believe.

She has been working on this project so long, it wears her out.

Now that they are in the testing phase, she had added help in the lab. Traudel was a striking charismatic young woman who was working toward a PHD. Her demeanor was demure and professional, and her lab coat strategically disguised her natural beauty.

Heidi should have seen it coming or was she part of the obsfication. The selection of test subjects was a process that needed discipline and took time. Of their first testers was a gentleman they referred to as Hans, and another was Pete. Hans was of traditional Bavarian background; Pete was from abroad.

They used caution as the product mandated, that on testing days, those undergoing testing, stayed on campus with comfortable accomadations. Use of the gym was prohibited, wanting to avoid mixing with the effects of endorphins. After a week, Pete seemed especially in a good mood as if he were high on something. At times, his speech went off the tracks in what one could describe as a poetic verve.

Putting statistics and equations to love seems counter intuitive. However, they were scientists that needed a measure of the attributes of love. Getraude and Heidi took equal turns measuring heart rate, body temperature, and brain wave activity. Most measurements were within the expected range other than that of Peter.

Peter’s results were normal but in half the cases they skewed unexpectedly. Peter abhored the plastic pills and the funny liquid within but took them with an orange soda. The pill was immense with a sugary plastic coating that would eventually melt in one’s mouth.

These initial cases were a fact-finding mission for the team. In clinical experiments you need to plan for the unexpected.

Heidi looked over the data for the better part of the morning. She sat perplexed but there seemed to be a pattern to the chaos. Distracted, she was getting hungry and ready to take a lunch break. She may have to eat at her desk.

In walked Traudel with two Doner Kababs from her favorite kiosk.the smell was pungent and deliciously teasing. Traudel sat across from her and started eating her lunch. She picked at her salad.

While comparing notes, she noticed that Traudel occasionally blushed at the mention of Pete’s name.

She looked over her glasses and gave Traudel a conspiratorial stare.

“I think he likes me. “

“You seem to like him as well.”

“They both blushed.”

She was a respected expert in testing methodology. Heidi now realized she made a mistake of an amateur.

She mindlessly watered her plastic tree with her empty watering can. Her people knew this as a nervous habit of hers.

She suspected Pete was the placebo. It wore her out.